Its time to start...

I thought after 3+ years of trying to conceive (TTC) that it was time to start writing about what is going on and when it goes on.
So, the back story.
I got pregnant with our son Charlie back in 2003. This was after I was told I would never be able to have children or that if I were to get pregnant that it would be short lived.
Well, my pregnancy was straight from hell. I spent most of it in the hospital or in a bed. I was miserable. I truely wouldn't have wished it even on my worst enemy.
My delivery was awful. I knew my water broke on Nov. 2nd, the nurses told me it didn't and to go home. I went for my appt on the 4th and after being sent home again Charlie was born via emergency c-section.
My recovery was a nightmare. Bleeding 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and being told it was normal.
I had several surgeries between the time of Charlie's birth to the Spring of 2005. And I still wasn't well.
After moving to Arkansas, I found a wonderful OB, a true angel to my family, who found that I had been living with Ovarian Cancer.
More surgeries occurred and after my battle I was told that I could still have children, it may only be one more, but it was possible.
So in April 2006 Tyler and I started trying. I got pregnant several times, all which ended in miscarriages. And in 2008 I decided to talk to my doctor about moving onto something else.
We went through multiple tests, more me than Tyler, but still both. Everything looked great. My tubes were clear, I was ovulating, Tyler's sperm count was beyond perfect. But nothing to show for any of it.
And thats when my doctor put me on 50mg of clomid, to give my body that extra little boost. Sure enough I got pregnant, Sept 2008. And within days of getting the news, I ended up in the ER being told that they were sorry and that I was starting to miscarry. Something about that time crushed me more than the others. Maybe it was because of the hope I had placed, I am not sure. But at that point I had lost 8 children and my heart just couldn't take anymore.
My OB wanted Tyler and I to see a RE (reproductive endocrinolgist) AKA fertility doctor, to see if maybe they could help us substain a pregnancy and then when I was ready I would go back to him.
I was very torn, but Tyler reminded me that there was nothing wrong with at least talking to the RE and see what options were available.
Oct 2008 we went and met with Dr. Moutos, angel number 2. He told us about TTC with an IUI with clomid and how he was confident that would be a good place for us to start.
Tyler and I spent a lot of time talking, making sure that IF we did this, that we were both on board and felt 100% comfortable with our decision. We decided to wait till after the holidays and then make our decision.
We went back in Jan 2009 to meet with Dr Moutos and tell him we were ready to try things his way and to give and IUI a chance.
On Jan 20th I got my period and I started the ball rolling with calling to schedule my cycle day (cd) 3 labs and u/s. I went in on the 22nd and got everything done and my script for the clomid and started taking it that day. On Jan 31st, I went back in for an u/s and blood work. This was going to check to see how many eggs I had and if I was ready to ovulate. I had one good egg but I did need to give myself a shot of Ovidrel (medicine to make your eggs drop). I went back on Feb 2nd for the IUI proceedure and kept my fingers crossed. Due to my m/c rate they put me on progesterone to help if I were to get pg.
Two weeks past and no pregnancy. It was time for round 2.
I went in for my cd labs and u/s on Feb 23... only this time they told me that my endometrium was thin and that could be causing problems, so that I needed to take estrogen after finishing the clomid and that that should help thicken it. Ok, another problem but an easy solution.
I went in on cd12 which was Mar 2 and again I only had 1 egg but I was ready to ovulate on my own, so I came back the next morning for my IUI. Another failed attempt.
March 24 came and I went in for labs and my u/s again. Things were looking good so I started my clomid. But my doctor also said he wanted to test me for Lupus, since lupus can cause m/c he wanted to rule it out. So they took some extra blood and I though nothing of it.
I went in on April 2nd for my u/s and again only 1 egg but again I needed the ovidrel to help it drop and I went in on April 4th for my IUI. Two weeks later and disappointment.
Then came the boom, my test results were back, I have Lupus. So that would explain why I have been having m/c. I am angry with my body for failing to do its job.
At this point Tyler and I decided to break because he was getting ready to leave for some training with the Army.
We talked to my doc and he said when it got closer to when we were ready to start trying again that we would come up with a good plan.
While Tyler was away we talked about trying as soon as he got back, but maybe just trying on our own, but with meds. So in July when I got my period I scheduled my u/s only this is when things started going crazy. They found 2 cysts! One on each ovary. The one on my left was the size of an orange and the one on the right the size of a golfball. So trying was out of question because I had to go on birth control. While I was on the b/c the pain got unbearable so I went back for another u/s and the cysts hadn't changed much so it was time to talk about surgery. ANOTHER SURGERY!!!
I figure, why not, I need to get rid of the pain. I scheduled it for Aug 6th and started getting things in order. But then they decided I needed to get in sooner so it got pushed up to July 30th.
It was supposed to be a simple Lap, remove any endo if needed and get rid of those stupid cysts.
But I ended up with complications. at 5 days post-op I had massive drainage from my belly button and after a CT scan we found I had an underlying infection. great! Then 3 days later I find out I have a blood clot in my arm from where the IV was placed during my surgery. So I certainly had to take care of those things first. But I was finally able to stop taking the b/c.
On Aug 20th I finally had my post-op appt and we talked to Dr Moutos about continuing on with trying. He said it was up to us, we could continue on our own or we could keep with the IUIs, that it wasn't time to move onto IVF. At first Tyler and I decided to just get a higher dose of clomid and continue on our own. But after much discussion we have decided to keep with the IUIs.
My period started yesterday, so I will be going in tomorrow morning to start my 4th cycle with IUI treatments.
I will write after my appt and once I know the game plan